Making Kendra (Part 2 of 7)

I have worked nights for over twenty years and during that span, unless I was on vacation, I have NEVER been up before noon. Still, Monday Morning I was up at 10 A.M, rushing to get dressed for my little trip to the Social Security office.

I quickly double checked to make sure that I had all of my forms together, in order and ready to present to the federal official and rushed out the door, “Maybe I can get my driver’s license today if I can get this done early.” I thought

Oh the optimism of a girl before she actually gets to where she is going. (So sweet and innocent.)

The place was freaking packed. I signed in, went straight to the women’s room to inspect my makeup and hair and waited and waited.

Aside from the four hours I had spent waiting, everything went without a hitch. Even though I had prepared myself for a fight, maybe even a little bit of humiliation along the way, it was all built up into my head for nothing. In fact…

“Sign here…initial here…sign here and date. Is everything correct here? Name Kendra Chelsea, gender Female?” The woman asked

“Yes, yes and yes.” I responded.

“It won’t show female on your new card but it will show it in the records. This is another form you will need to get your new driver’s license.” She said and handed me a little slip of paper, “They will call your name in just a few minutes.”

So, even though now the federal records reflected my new name and gender it came at a cost of time, it was too late to go to the Motor Vehicles Administration and if I was totally honest with myself I was cutting it close to arriving to work on time.

But at least I could cross off another thing on my list and move on.

So I grabbed my card, rushed home and did the quick change back to Ken and headed to work, yeah, for the first time in twenty years I was late. Okay I was only four minutes late and yeah, no one noticed but once again I was angry with myself, Ken was never late but it was starting to become a habit with Kendra.

So Tuesday comes and I was already exhausted when I went to bed and now at 9 AM I felt worse than I did when I went to bed but if I could get my driver’s license, well it would be worth it. Besides I had made a point to keep Wednesday open so I could catch up on my sleep.

Well I was not expecting good things to happen at the MVA, it was always bad, the lines were always long and the wait was always torturous but I was not expecting being handed a number that said E-11 and after checking they were calling number E-47.

“Excuse me miss, I think this might be wrong. They already passed my number.” I asked the woman at the service counter.

“Oh sweetie, they will go through the numbers again, it’s going to be a wait, sorry about that.” She responded.

“Oh lord, how could it be 47 degrees outside and be 90 inside?” I asked myself as I tried to find an open seat. “My makeup is going to be absolutely destroyed for my picture.”

As soon as I was seated I took my phone from my purse and started playing a tap game that I had downloaded in preparation for any extended wait times I would experience during my time dealing with federal office red-tape.

“This is horrible.” The girl I sat down next to said. “I have already been waiting for an hour and it looks like I have a few more hours to go.”

“I didn’t expect it to be this bad either, might as well get it over with, you know?” I responded as I made a very conscious effort to sit like a girl.

“What are you here for?” She asked.

I really hadn’t looked at her before we started talking but that made me take a second to look up from my phone. She was a very attractive girl, probably a little younger than my daughter. “Oh, I am here to have my name and gender changed on my driver’s license.” I responded proudly.

“Wow, really, you don’t look transgender.” She said as she smiled at me.

I chuckled…”What does a transgender woman look like?” I joked

“No, I mean, well, you look like a girl already.” She said apologetically.

“I know what you meant, I was just joking with you. I am so sorry, it is kind of a habit of mine to joke about things that make people uncomfortable. I appreciate that, really, that’s very nice of you to say.” I responded.

“My dad is like that, he always makes people feel uncomfortable but that’s his way, it’s okay, but I am not lying, you really look like a woman.” She repeated

Well the wait could be worse, at least I seemed to have good company. I put my phone away and we chatted a bit before her number was finally called. “Good luck sweetie.” I said as she gathered her things to leave.

“Good luck to you too Kendra.”

And when my number was finally called, three hours later, as I had expected my makeup was trashed, my hair was wet from sweat and I was totally frustrated. It did not help matters that I was about to be given bad news.

“Miss Kendra, you have to take this to the district office for the medical review board before we can change your gender.” The officer said to me in the most polite way he could.

“Wait, what, I thought I read online that…” I began before I started to realize it was my mistake, I must have been looking at the wrong thing, or the wrong states information. “You mean I have to go to Glen Burnie, wait for hours and then come back here and wait for more hours?”

“Well we could issue you a new driver’s license with your new name but without the approval letter we cannot change your gender without medical clearance.”

“So forty dollars now to change my name and then another forty to change my gender after I get the required forms?”

“Yes, sorry but that is the best we can do.”

I really didn’t have to think about it. Just the thought of having my driver’s license say Kendra Chelsea meant the world to me. “Okay, let’s do it.” I responded as I used my phone/camera as a mirror to check to make sure I was presentable.

“Look up…No up more…Hold your head straight, no you are tilting your head…” The officers said, I could tell he was getting a little frustrated but being the self-proclaimed selfie queen I knew the pose I needed to have to have an acceptable picture but his irritating guidance was preventing me from striking that pose.

“That’s it, hold it right there…” He said as he snapped the picture.

Seconds later he handed me my new driver’s license and I responded back by handing him my credit card. I must have beamed as I saw my new name and then frowned as I noticed the cow of a picture he had taken.

“Sorry but that’s the way we have to take the picture. Besides no one takes a good driver’s license photo, it’s just the way it is.” He said trying to reassure me.

“We will see about that.” I said as I glanced over the distance between the camera and the chair. “I have to come back again soon.” And then I glanced at the time, “Oh no, I have fifteen minutes before work, NO WAY I make it.”

I was beginning to realize this was my new life…Wake up, get dressed, rush home with no hopes of getting to work on time, get undressed, get dressed again, come home, get undressed, get dressed for bed…I was happy but I realized this was eventually going to make me lose my mind.

#Identification #namechange #MVA #SocialSecurity #work