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My sweet baby girl. I know life is hard and complicated and I know that you are struggling just to make it through the holidays but I just wanted to wish you a Merry Christmas and a Happy New year.
Of course there is more to my letter than just sending out a little love; I wanted to touch on some of the reasons why you have ALL of my love.
You are my first born and you cannot even begin to understand what that means so instead I want to tell you how much I understand you. I KNOW how you feel when you try to explain the things that you are going through only to find people just look at you with a blank stare and you feel like they are saying to you, “Just get over it; just don’t feel that way.”
Sweetie, they won’t get it; there is a certain breed of people that won’t look past how they feel. They will not read about what science says (because science is well, just someone’s opinion) they will not feel empathy and they most certainly not take a few minutes to listen.
It is the way of life; some people will allow their misguided opinion to guide them and their biggest fear in life is that they might read facts or a scientific paper that disproves their bigoted opinions. My best shot at giving you advice would be to try and feel sorry for them and then find some way to look past them.
Those people are stuck in their tiny, little worlds with their tiny, little opinions and their world will never get any better. And try to understand that for me I look on you with such envy.
You will get to live long enough to see the world evolve; with each decade that passes, more and more of those ignorant souls disappear and before you know it, most of the uneducated will have disappeared into history.
So with that said let me tell you what I actually think of you.
Miranda, you are the most beautiful woman in the world. Not just on the surface but underneath it all too.
And here is something you did not know that I see all too clearly, you are one of the strongest people that I have encountered. You are going through so much, you have so much weighing you down, eating away at you but you keep going.
Yes I know that sometimes you feel like you aren’t getting anywhere, but you are. If other people had to live inside your head for just a minute I honestly believe that they would crumble into the fetal position in the corner of the room and give up.
That isn’t you and I pray that you will always have the strength to do exactly what you have been doing for as long as you live. The world needs more people, more daughters like you.
You lost your family and you kept going, you lived through what must be the most difficult puberty that anyone has ever experienced and you kept going and when you lost your grandfather and then ultimately your dad (although you gained a very loving and supporting moddy) you kept going.
In fact you didn’t just keep going, you knocked it out of the park. You took my hand and led me through the scariest time in my life. “Don’t be a little bitch dad, get out of the car and go into the store.” (Thank you for that Miranda)
Believe me when I say, I could not be more proud of you.
And for Christmas let me say, Miranda, the most amazing beautiful daughter anyone could have, If in 1990 god had come to me and said, “Kendra, I am giving you a gift; I am allowing you to create your daughter from scratch, you make every decision about how she looks and how she is as a human being.” I would look god in the eyes and tell him without hesitation, I want a daughter like you.
Ha, I know that there are some things you would want to change about yourself but sweetie, those things, and those burdens you carry are what make you the most wonderful person I have ever met.
Miranda, during this holiday season, I wish you peace. No matter where you go, what you do, I will love you with all of my heart. Merry Christmas.
Signed your biggest fan
Kendra Chelsea
