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“Hey bud; what have you been? I haven’t talked to you in a couple of weeks.” I said to Brendan when he answered the phone.
“Okay I guess, nothing much, haven’t been going out lately.” Brendan responded, to me it sounded as if he had just woke up.
“I was just checking in, maybe you would like to go out with us this Saturday, doing a little club hopping; you can meet the guy I have been talking to?” I continued, “You can bring your girlfriend.”
“She is not my girlfriend.” He growled.
“Yea, I know, you told me that before.”
“I will ask, where would you want to meet up?” He asked.
“DC 9 to start, it’s a straight club so don’t worry.” I answered with a little sarcastic twist.
“It doesn’t matter either way but I will ask her, okay we probably will go.”
It is funny; as I write this and the story before, I get a little kick at how many ways I subconsciously tried to ruin my reunion with Keith.
Especially our text exchanges, he tried so hard, was so accommodating but I just continually blew him off and then I invite my wife and her boyfriend and now I go as far as bringing my son along- yes my son… And you know what? I had no intentions of telling him that either.
Now I have to ask myself why? He was attractive, he was sweet, he treated me like any woman would want to be treated and still I was reluctant.
“Remember you are not allowed to bring a man into this house unless I know him and I am okay with it.” Kimberly told me over and over.
And as I crawled into the back seat of the car dressed in my most flattering clubwear I had already came to the conclusion that he would not be there, yes my luck would be that I invite my family to witness my first date since I began transition only to entertain them with my first experience with being stood up. “Oh my god I am going to get drunk.” I thought as Tony pulled away from the curb; I felt like I was heading to my doom.
Of course, I must have thought that I had not put Keith through the ringer enough so the normally very punctual Kendra was over a half an hour late.
But… There he was, sitting alone in the booth that we once made out in.
“Hey Kendra.” He said as soon as he noticed me in the club.
“Hey Keith, this is my wife Kimberly, her boyfriend Tony and my son Brendan and his girlfriend.” I responded.
“Your son? You did not tell me you were bringing your entire family.” He said; but overall he took the surprise quite well.
Kimberly headed straight for the bar; Brendan and his girl went upstairs to the dancefloor while sat Tony took the older brother role by sitting directly across from me and Keith. “What’s up?” Keith nodded, while Tony just sat there with a judgmental look on his face.
After a few moments of uncomfortable silence Keith left to order me a drink and as soon as he was out of earshot I growled, “What are you doing? Go away please.”
Tony shrugged and pulled himself out of the booth and disappeared into the crowd.
“You blindsided me Kendra; you could have warned me your son would be here.” Keith said when he returned to the table with our drinks.
“Sorry, it was kind of a last minute thing; didn’t think you would have got the message before we got here.” I responded but was actually thinking, “If I told you I was a big coward and I was trying to surround myself with people I knew, you probably would not have showed up.”
“It’s okay; just tell me next time.” He said as he sat down next to me.
Here is the thing; that simple little remark made me quiver. He wasn’t mean, he wasn’t angry, instead it was a point blank statement and I deserved it. “This is a real man; I like that.” I thought to myself.
We talked about a half an hour before he asked me to go dancing and as you are well aware it was like asking a fish if he wanted to go for a swim.
Still, it was hot and the club was filling with people quickly. I could feel myself begin to sweat away all the work I had put into my makeup so when I noticed my son staring up at us at a booth near the dancefloor I took that opportunity to take a break.
As Keith and I approached the table Brendan and his girl began to laugh.
“WHAT?” I snapped.
“Nothing, I just told her you dance like a slut.”
“Thanks Bren, I love you too.”
After we had our fill of the place we all decided to move on to the next place. “Vortex.”
It started to get blurry after that. I am guessing it was the five drinks I had between dancing sessions. Unfortunately by the time we were finished with Vortex I was both exhausted and my makeup was all but gone and my face and hair was drenched with sweat.
I followed Keith outside to cool off a bit.
“I like you Kendra, you are all woman to me.” He said as he noticed me standing beside him.
“You are pretty nice yourself Keith.” I responded and put my arms around him, closed my eyes and put my lips against his. Yes I lost myself in the moment and yet, the moment was lost when I heard Brendan’s voice.
“I am here…Right here…Kendra.”
Yep, got busted making out with Keith by my son…how utterly humiliating. I had to excuse myself and go back into the bar to where Kimberly was.
“Please tell me this is the last bar, I am getting tired.” She said
“Have you even talked to Keith?” I asked.
“I haven’t had the chance; too loud, too crowded.” She responded.
“Well he is right outside, go talk to him. Besides, I would be ready to leave right this second if you said you liked him enough to let me invite him home.”
“Whatever.” She grumbled and left to join Keith, while I stayed behind to let them have some alone time.
After about ten minutes Kimberly returned. “Yea, he is fine, ask him if he wants to come home with you…” She huffed and when she noticed my wide smile she followed it up with, “Slut…”
Of course he said yes, thank god.
And just when I thought I had a perfect night, as the six of us were walking back to the car, for the first time since I began transition over a year prior, I get clocked…Well half clocked anyway. “It’s a fucking woman…” One guy barked, “No it’s a fucking man, I am telling you.”
Really, first time in over a year and it happens on my first date? It didn’t take me long to realize the combination of my sweat soaked hair and the lack of makeup made me look, well, not like myself. And just when I thought I would die of humiliation Keith slipped his hand in mine, looked me square in the eyes and said, “I only see a woman.”
Excuse my crude, barbaric language but after that comment, after the way he had treated me the entire night, I had already came to a disturbing conclusion, “this man was going to get lucky tonight.”
Or, if you think it on a broader plane, was it me that was going to get lucky?
Yes, it was over a year since I decided I would live for the rest of my life as a woman and I was realizing that I had quite a bit to learn. First and foremost, how your wife, your sister wife might react to the simplest of questions. I think it was about 4 AM when I stumbled out of my bedroom and kind of felt my way into her bedroom and fumbled with some items on her makeup table. I guess I was making enough noise that it woke her up. “What are you doing? Why are you in my room?” I heard her say.
“I need a hair-tie…Do you have a hair-tie I can use?”
And just like a best friend would do, she drug herself out of her bed, flipped on the light and quickly located one. As she shoved it into my hand she said one simple word that said it all…”Whore.” And then she returned to bed.
